Sunday, March 7, 2010

Jobless...

I should be happy because my mum didn't nag me to look for a job instead she told me if i couldn't find a job then stay at home...however i felt unhappy...i don't know why i will feel this way...sigh...being jobless suppose to be a happy thing,majority of the people hope for this kind of life...hahaha...to me it doesn't seem to be like this...i can't imagine i might stay at home for 3 months without any incomes...sigh...feeling useless for myself...if my family is rich then i have no worries at all...what i worries the most is the fees for my further education...with my current savings, i don't think is enough...there are still a lots of things to buy...i mean useful things for my life in uni...sigh...when talk about money really made people headache...i know ptptn loan will help me but i don't know how much amount I'll be able to get from ptptn loan or maybe i will be so unlucky to unable get ptptn loan..hahahaha...actually sometimes i do hate myself...i know there is a current job quite ok...that is be a kinder garden teacher...although the pay is not very high but at least the time is not long...the problem is i don't like teaching kids...sigh...i don't know whats wrong with me but whenever i imagine myself teaching kids,i feel scary...hahahahaha...that's y i still jobless now...another problem is my transportation...almost my whole family go to work with their own transport...my uncle with my mum will drive lorry then my elder bro will drive his car and my second bro will drive his motor...so left no other vehicles except my bicycle...sigh...i do thought of cycle to work but when i think of after work i have to cycle back to my home, i feel so tired...the weather, my energy left and bicycle made me feel so tiring...if i really cycle to work,i can guarantee the next time u all meet me, i will look like an Indian or Malays...hahahaha...to work i need to think of ways to solve my problems...sigh...how nice if i got motor now, then i can find any work i want...anyway i am not giving up to find jobs but if till May i still couldn't find any jobs then i will give up and get ready for my uni life...hahahaha...after telling this, i do feel some relief in my mind...^_^

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

A New Life....

After knowing my STPM result, a new life start to begin...of course i can confirm that i am not going to private universities...my only way to continue study is get to enter local university...i have make up my mind...i have chose what courses and which university i want...i just doubt to place which courses is the priority...i doubt..i don't know which courses i should place it as my first choice then second choice and so on...to me what i have chose seem to be equal...i keep this in mind "serena, the decision u made shall be the correct way to your future.You should not regret it one day.Believe in your decision.God is always by your side to guide you and lead you."...honestly say i do scare that i might end up jobless in future...hahaha but this might not happen too...we don't know what our future are going to be...

i do feel excited to enter uni life...
Why? The reasons are...
1.i can get to learn new things.
2.i can get to meet new friends.
3.i can learn to be independent.

anyway i do feel sad because...
1.i have to leave my home sweet home for a period of time.
2.i will miss my family.
3.i will miss my old friends.
4.i will miss the memories i spent with all my friends and family.
5.i will miss my mum's cooking.

Hopefully the new environment suits me...as i am taking those courses involved with ecologist and biodiversity or plants, so i guess my environment will be mostly greenery...hahahaha...green means peace of mind...^_^ ...its about 4 months more and i am going to enter uni...so now i should grad every chance to go out gathering with my friends...of course there are also time for my family too...hahahaha...i know when i enter uni, i should focus on my study more than anything else...i want to be the best among the best...at least with this aim, i can guarantee for my future...^_^...all the best to my friends...may God bless us...^_^